Recently, I’ve been on a high with Jesus and our relationship is all gumdrops and rainbows. I love it. But I know it’s not realistic. I know He and I are going to have to go through hard times together. And I don’t want to turn my back on Him. So I asked Him to test my new depth of faith in Him. He gave me something small. A rough morning. It was cold and snowy and I was tired. I didn’t wake up fully to do my daily reading. I fell asleep during the second audio plan on my Bible app. I get on the highway to go to work, my 55 minute commute is now over an hour because of traffic. My morning commute is usually filled with prayer and love, but this one was filled with frustration, anxiety, and anger. My love for Jesus gave me more of a peace over my emotions, so they weren’t as heightened as they normally would be, but it still wasn’t as calm as it usually is. Rather than letting my emotions take over, I just told Him, “I need you to take this.” And He did. Every time I got too anxious about my job, and being late, I said, “Alyssa, what do you fear more, losing your job, or losing the love of Jesus?” I chose losing His love. It really put things into perspective for me. I know He wouldn’t stop loving me because I got angry in traffic, but when I’m having an issue, I like to put things into perspective to make me realize how small my issues as. I like to remind myself what I truly am afraid of. For instance, I went to Dunkin this same morning. My coffee didn’t come out great, but I thanked God I was in a warm vehicle and had money to pay for my breakfast. Perspective.
So I got to work, and I was a little cranky. Not my normal sunshiney self. I put my numbers up on the board for our morning meeting and ran back to my office for quiet time. I got out my devotional and it grabbed my pencil case on its way out. My pencil case was open. So everything came out of the pencil case into my backpack. I put my head down and said, “Jesus, please.” And He took that frustration so quick. I opened my devotional and the header reads, “Well, What Do You Expect?” All I could do was laugh. The summary said, “trust Him.” I asked Him to test my new relationship and faith with Him and He did. He’s building my character. He gave me something small, like traffic that would normally set me off into a blind rage, and instead, I relied on Jesus to get me through it. And He answered my prayer to test my newfound faith, and He sent peace over me. If you listen, and are patient, I know He will do the same for you. Give your troubles and worries to Jesus. He has your back.
With light and love, Lyss
1/17/2024